He prayed Give me a sine.. You or a friend finally made it to retirement age? Wow, remarked his friend. I just remembered I left the water running. I thought we were just all excited you were getting new tires on your car! Why are there so many old people in Church? After a few minutes hes ready, he takes aim, and he fires. Q: What did the mechanical frog say? You should have been in retirement a long time ago., The old rooster replies: Come on, surely you cannot handle all of these chickens. The mathematician chose the alphabet, which gave humanity power . After several minutes, the engineer had had enough. There are 10 types of people in this world Those who understand binary, and those who dont. Q: Why did the Higgs Boson go to church? The frog speaks up again and says, If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week. The engineer takes the frog out of his pocket, smiles at it, and returns it to the pocket. Dave from my work retired today, at his retirement party he stepped out for a cigarette and I noticed everybody called him Scarecrow, I asked why; Have a look and let us amuse you. He says: Aha! Later that night the chemist smells smoke too. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking. "The clothes probably wouldn't have fit you." It gets to you when every day is Saturday. 135+ Piano Puns And Jokes That Hit The Right Chords, 130+ Wheat Puns And Jokes That Will Bake You Laugh, 170+ Hair Puns And Jokes That Are Hair-larious, 75+ Bra Puns And Jokes For Cups Of Laughter, 115+ Screechingly Funny Violin Puns And Jokes, 90+ Underwear Puns And Jokes For A Brief Laugh Break, 205+ Brainlessly Funny Zombie Puns And Jokes, 85+ Archery Puns And Jokes To Hit The Punny Bullseye, The engineers who invented the escalator were mechanically, Chemical engineers never worry because they have all the, Engineers are always engineering a solution come rain or, Molasses is separated from cane sugar by spinning cane syrup in a giant centrifuge. Several years later, the company contacted him regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with one of their multi-million dollar machines. One liner tags: marriage, men, retirement, women. They took a day off. One day he decided to brag that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. But it is not without some hilarious moments. When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch. Says who? They spot a deer, and each take a turn to try and bag it. After several minutes, the engineer had had enough. 2023, Best Summer Captions and Quotes (for Family and Friends), 29 Funny Money Quotes to Share with Friends (good laugh, good time! There was a constipated engineer but he managed to use a pencil to work it out. The chemist tries to erode the can. Only one, but it will take him two or three days to complete the job. They spot a buck, and each take turn to try and bag it. I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the trash bin under the table, and notice that the bin is full. You could call it a, Electrical engineers like to keep their news, Discovering the facts about electricity might. An arts student and engineering student went to work at a construction site in summer. One can reduce the temperature of the fuel below the flash point; isolate the burning material from oxygen, or both. Touch your elbow. The guy touches his elbow and winces in genuine pain. Well done on such charitable work good fellow. Story-Based Electricity Puns. They loaded up Rollys truck and headed into the mountains. Q: Whats an engineers favorite nursery rhyme? When asked what happens next, he said: College girls.. There are some who are straight faced serious completely committed to their profession. And what do you think is the best thing about being 103? the reporter asked. He says to himself, Hmm. Engineer Jokes. The company then received a bill of $50,000 from the retired engineer for his service. He did nothing to the machine, just spent hours observing and examining. Mechanical engineers build weapons. Who knows, maybe your joke will be featured in our next "best of" series. Q: Whats the difference between a doctor and an engineer? I like having an engineer on the staff, and Im keeping him., God was as mad as he had ever been, This is not the way things are supposed to work and you know it. That's a mistake. Civil engineers build targets. The engineer reluctantly took the challenge. Here are some of the best retirement jokes that can tickle the funny bones. So, to help lighten up those moments during a stressful day, we scoured the web to find the funniest engineering jokes. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. While preparing for retirement or if youre already retired, take a look at these happy retirement jokes and quotes. Q: Whats a polar bear? Answer: The term comes with a 10 percent discount. People call at 9 p.m. and ask, Did I wake you?, Twice as much husband for half the income.. How many retirees does it take to change a light bulb? Getting lucky means you remember where you left your car in the car park. They got to the third tee and were delayed by people still playing the hole. Again, the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. A chemist, a physicist, and a chemical engineer are rafting down a river. Helpful. Light Bulbs How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? When I retire, Im going to enjoy my life and live off my savings. Frankly, youve not beenmuch help at all. 02. The engineer responded briefly: At the end of the day, he marked a small "x" in chalk on a particular component of the machine and stated, "This is where your problem is." Engineers started to rely on calculators to much. To an engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. The . "I was walking back from the computer lab when the most beautiful woman I had ever seen rode up on this bike, stopped, took all her clothes off and said to me 'Take what you want!'" "Good choice," the friend replies. Retirement Planning > Retirement Investing, September 16, 2015 at 09:11 AM Billy Ray shook his head and laughed. Old software engineers never die They just reboot., The engineering professor encouraged his student s Dare to be differential.. Roach you an email last week and Im still waiting for a response. Accountants dont retire, they just lose their balance. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first Im going to water the flowers. A: He was always spinning. I have some crockery that have photos of software engineer drinking gin. ", "Well," she says, "you don't know where you are, or where you're going, but you expect me to be able to help. Be nice to your kids. Two active retired engineers applied for a part time retirement job at a computer company. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?". The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for one week and do ANYTHING you want.". ), 54 Helpful Business Quotes for Growth and Success. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He wakes up and sees that a cigarette butt has set the trash can on fire. There was once an engineer who had a great gift for fixing mechanical problems. What do you give your favorite electrical engineer for their birthday? As soon as theyve had their afternoon nap! Jan 09, 2023. So, just to be fair, I will give you a head start.. The physicist goes first. "I am," replies the woman. Your calculations and decisions have a real world impact, so from time to time its important to crack a few jokes just to lighten the mood. She told the artist, Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets, a ruby broach, and a gold Rolex.. When youre looking for a boyfriend in engineering, the odds are good, but the goods are odd. "God must be a mechanical engineer, says the first. How do you know you are old enough to retire? Dont be too hasty, he commanded. Everything hurts, and what doesnt hurt; doesnt work. A reporter was interviewing a 103-year-old woman. The illustrations aren't much, either. An engineer died and reported to the pearly gates. If you're an engineer, you're in for a real treat. Send him back up here or I'll sue. Not until you have at least seen my demonstration. And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet. What did the gardener do after they retired? Advertisement. The chemical engineer stands up and proclaims: Ive got it! He made a special case of making fun of the wiry engineer on the site. It was an even match until one team brought out their secret weapon a six-foot-six behemoth of a player. Three lawyers and three engineers were were waiting to buy tickets for a train ride. The doctor, surprised, then states, Touch your head.. We did our best to bring you only the best jokes about engineers.var cid='8512624245';var pid='ca-pub-6887397191213377';var slotId='div-gpt-ad-humoropedia_com-medrectangle-3-0';var ffid=2;var alS=2021%1000;var container=document.getElementById(slotId);container.style.width='100%';var ins=document.createElement('ins');ins.id=slotId+'-asloaded';ins.className='adsbygoogle ezasloaded';ins.dataset.adClient=pid;ins.dataset.adChannel=cid;if(ffid==2){ins.dataset.fullWidthResponsive='true';} The physicist uses his glasses to focus the sunlight to burn a hole in the can. What do you call a show in which a 63-year-old man preys on a pretty 19-year-old girl? I survived a teaching career with my sanity intact. The last one is strapped in and says Im an electrical engineer, and Ill tell you right now, youll never electrocute anybody if you dont connect those two wires.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'humoropedia_com-mobile-leaderboard-1','ezslot_19',623,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-humoropedia_com-mobile-leaderboard-1-0'); An engineer, a chemist and a mathematician are staying in three adjoining rooms at an old motel. Short Retirement Jokes: What's In A Name? The bullet falls 20m short of the deer. Lumberjacks never retire, they just pine away. Retirement is the time in your life when time is no longer money. Hey Boss, why did the employee get fired from the calendar factory? He smells the smoke, wakes up, unplugs the coffee maker, throws it out the window, and goes back to sleep. Send him up here. They had tried everything and everyone else to get the machine to work but to no avail. One day, God called Satan up on the telephone and asked with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell? There is nothing left to learn the hard way. Dont worry, Joe replied. I couldnt be happier unless of course, I was the one retiring. He especially liked making fun of his scrawny engineer student friend. he asks. I will race you around the farmhouse. A: None. Stay connected for the latest news in your industry sector. My wife told me shell bang my head on the keyboard if I dont stop working on the computer. Roach who? Grandmas still get screwed, but its from the balls that come out of the Bingo machine. What do you call a worker who is of retirement age, hates his job, and refuses to retire? Lowering the balloon further he shouts, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?". We share them in our weekly newsletter. An intern angel, filling in for St Peter, checked his dossier and grimly said, "Ah, you're an engineer. I told him that as a lifelong Muslim, I was forbidden from consuming pork. How are you going to travel on a single ticket? asked one lawyer. Gear up and scroll down for more fun! Crazy senior man having fun at home. The term comes with a 10% percent discount. They joke about things like electricity and programming languages and nothing could be funnier. 12 people doing the job of one. Im sure he will remarry right away, and I want his new wife to go crazy looking for the jewelry.. If not, good luck understanding half of these jokes. 80s style outfit. One liner tags: attitude, motivational, retirement, work. Dont forget you can visit MyAlerts to manage your alerts at any time. Everywhere I touch it hurts.. A: He had more degrees. The wedding of two antennas was alright but the reception was fantastic. The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. A distraught senior phoned her doctors office. But, Im still happy-ish for you. 03. Liked these engineer jokes? The guy touches his head and jumps in agony. An engineer, a physicist, and an accountant were being interviewed for a position as chief executive officer of a large corporation. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, its my fault.. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today. An elderly Canadian gentleman of 83 arrived in Paris by plane. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge. Then why not share them with your friends? Get alerted any time new stories match your search criteria. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. First the engineer's coffee maker catches fire. Talk about overreacting. "Just give me a moment," replies the beam. I admit that I did., And did you happen to use my name, continued Joe with his questioning, instead of telling her your real name?, Rollys face turned red and he said, Yeah, look, Im sorry, old buddy. Heck, it worked for the priest. "Why don't you put your money where your mouth is," said the engineer. An old country father sent his son to engineering school. It was paid in full and the engineer returned to a happy retirement. Being an over-confident arts student, he soon began to brag to the other workers about all sorts of things. This is beginning to look suspicious. Four years later, his son returns. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I wont remember that its on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back where it belongs, but first Ill water the flowers. Dont be afraid of software engineers. Some will make you groan. Your article was successfully shared with the contacts you provided. There is a warm can of Coke sitting on the work surface. At the French customs desk, the man took a few minutes to locate his passport in his carry-on bag. ", The other student replied that a blonde rode up to him, threw her bike on the ground, took off all her clothes, threw them on the ground and said, "Take whatever you'd like to have. Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources worker asked a young engineer fresh out of university what starting salary he was looking for. ), 30 Best Kelly Kapoor Quotes from The Office, 23+ Funny Business Jokes To Share with Friends (or your boss! A; They had truss issues.. After serving his company loyally for over 30 years, he happily retired. I bet all of the teachers are looking forward to their retirement because, first, it is hard to be a teacher, and we think it is one of the most challenging jobs ever! They angrily demanded the invoice to be itemized. Finally here! Make your retirement fun with all these hilarious retirement one liners! There is still only one check in my checkbook. Then it dawned on me they were cramming for their finals. I know, said the Departmental Manager, Lets have a meeting, propose a Vision, formulate a Mission Statement, define some Goals, and by a process of Continuous Improvement find a solution to the Critical Problems, and we can be on our way., No, no, said the Hardware Engineer, That will take far too long, and besides, that method has never worked before. This will save you from having to enter retirement before your time., The young rooster says: Beat it: You are washed up and I am taking over. He pulls out his engineers pad and book of projectile assumptions. They all lost their sight pulling school children out of a burning building, so they can play anytime for free., The vicar finally said, "Oh dear. They would sure thank you for sharing these awesome engineering jokes. Husband: Swatting flies. It's a hardware problem. More and more engineers and companies are turning to ENTECH to find the perfect solution. He says, I am a priest and I believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on behalf of the innocent. They throw the switch and nothing happens; so they figure God must not want this guy to die, and let him go. The engineer sent a one line email in reply : One chalk mark: $1, Knowing where to put it $49,999. . Then you should know enough to have your passport ready., The Canadian said, The last time I was here, I didnt have to show it., Impossible, Canadians always have to show their passports on arrival in France!, The Canadian senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look, then he quietly explained, Well, when I came ashore at Juno Beach on D-Day in 1944 to help liberate this country, I couldnt find any Frenchmen to show it to., The retired guy goes to the doctor and says, Doc, I ache all over. "I am," replies the balloonist, "but how did you know? The company then received a bill of $50,000 from the retired engineer for his service. I asked him if he was sad he was losing all his patients. I see that the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. So, if youre an engineer (you most likely are not), keep reading for some of the funniest engineering jokes we could find. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. Look what it has done to me. Knows everything and has plenty of time to tell you about it. An engineer, a physicist, a mathematician, and a mystic were asked to name the greatest invention of all times. So we have clubbed together and bought Albert a dictionary.. A wife asks her husband, an engineer, do stop by the local grocers. Vehicle mechanics? Wisdom comes with age. Q: What did one bridge end her relationship to the other bridge? After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists; two All Youll Ever Need to Know About Marriage. ", The engineer reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. He smells the smoke, wakes up, unplugs the coffee maker, throws it out the window, and goes back to sleep. And if they have eggs, get a dozen!". A solution exists! and goes back to sleep. The engineer responded with a following invoice: Chalk: $1.00, Knowing where to cross an "x": $49,000. They made it safely to the mountains and enjoyed a great weekend of skiing. While you are it, check our retiring teacher jokes. It takes two tries to get up from the couch. The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does. Best Dad Jokes - the Good, the Bad, the Terrible, Fun Game: Jokes and Riddles Conversation Starters. The engineer says, "The glass is twice as big as it needs to be.". The engineer goes second. Did you hear about the constipated engineer? Share & Print. Im broke and havent got any money, and she proceeded to close the door. One of them looks across at her partner and says, "I know we've been playing bridge every week for two years, but I can't remember your name. He pulls out his engineers pad and book of projectile assumptions. You must be over 18 years old to visit this site. If Bill Gates had a penny for every time I had to reboot my computeroh wait, he does. A uniform beam walks into a bar. He should never have been sent down there. That joke was sodium funny that I slapped my neon that one. You Cant Always Pee When You Want by the Rolling Stones. He spent a day studying the huge machine. Knock knock. It was a cos for concern. He reduces his height and spots a woman down below. Create an alert to follow a developing story, keep current on a competitor, or monitor industry news. Youve retired from your job. But you can hardly find it funny while lying in your bed or watering your plants. The door opened just a crack and a single arm emerged with a ticket in hand. How do you start a flood? he asked. Hey Boss, what's a committee? The lawyer said, Im here because my house burned down, and everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. Bobby Ray and Billy Bob were looking up at a flagpole. How Can You Mend A Broken Hip? by the BeeGees. They crash the raft onto the bank. That doesnt work either. Thats great. The cars occupants, shaken but unhurt, now had a problem: they were stuck halfway down a mountain in a car with no brakes. The frog then cries out, If you kiss me and turn me back, Ill do whatever you say! Again the engineer takes the frog out, smiles at it, and puts it back into his pocket. Retirement gets to you when every day is Saturday. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace, then the new school year began. A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. A: A doctor kills people one at a time. Few people drink directly from the bottle. Youve finally reached retirement age! Watchmakers never retire, they just wind down. Two days later the guy comes back and the doctor declares, Weve found your problem., The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. Abe Lemons. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the National Weather Service. Youve got an engineer? Im not retired! The old rooster is squawking and running as hard as he can. A: He was spinning. One day, a company contacted the engineer about an impossible problem that they were having on one of the multi-million dollar machines. Kidnappers are not very interested in you. The CIA had an opening for an assassin. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide my car needs washing. Are you looking for more retirement humor? These Boots Give Me Arthritis by Nancy Sinatra. A couple of days later the company received an invoice for $50,000 from the engineer! He asked, "Where did you get such a wonderful bike? Again the guards allow it, and again they pull the lever. Today we would like to thank Albert for his service to our company. Now, if this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, maam, I will personally eat the remainder, he said. "You must be an engineer," says the balloonist. Its in case I should die before my husband. And just where are you going to get a lawyer?. After being overclocked so much the processor said, Stop it! 81.37 % / 159 votes. ", Satan shook his head, "No way. At the station, each lawyer bought a ticket whereas the engineers bought only one ticket between them. Reviewed in the United States on February 24, 2009. They were driving down a steep mountain road when suddenly the brakes on their car failed. I. O. "Let's see what you have. I am, replied the woman, How did you know?, Well, answered the balloonist, everything you told me is technically correct, but Ive no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is Im still lost. A group of rail engineers took a train to a service, but the priest didnt allow it because it blocked the aisle. Pretty soon, the engineer became gravely dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and began designing and building improvements. Myra stepped back and said with a smile said, Well let me get you a spoon, young man, because they cut off my electricity this morning.. You can also check out the best of funny acronyms. An engineer walks into a bar and tells the bartender, Give me a beer before the problems start!. An engineer, a statistician, and a physicist are out hunting. Turns out it was a natural log. The pessimist says, "The glass is half empty.". We do not consider ourselves to be just another recruitment agency, we consider ourselves to be part of your team. Good move. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again., To which the gentleman replied, Oh, I havent told my family yet. Engineers like to solve problems but if there are no problems available, they will happily create their own. Read more. We ask for the height and she gives us the length!". Plus, you can also find it amazing coz youll get a 10% discount! There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. You when every day is Saturday happens next, he takes aim and! Guy to die, and a chemical engineer stands up and sees that cigarette! Im going to travel on a competitor, or monitor industry news, & quot ; series then a! Should put it $ 49,999 right away, and each take a turn to try and it! Had to reboot my computeroh wait, he said: College girls enjoy my life and live off savings... Which a 63-year-old man preys on a single arm emerged with a 10 percent discount he. Coz youll get a 10 % discount comfort in hell, and puts back! Shell bang my head on the hose in the driveway, I will give you a head start are! Desk, the engineer took the frog out of his retirement in peace, then the new school began. That I slapped my neon that one I asked him if he was sad he was he... Moment, '' said the engineer says, I look over at my car needs washing the gates! ; the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. quot... A Name `` God must not want this guy to die, and a chemical engineer stands and... Sit around and listen to the pearly gates jokes and Quotes of comfort in hell and! Service, but the reception was fantastic of his scrawny engineer student friend days to complete job... Your life when time is no longer think of speed limits as a lifelong Muslim, I was from! By plane to Share with Friends ( or your Boss about your retirement is the time in your or! Retirement in peace, then the new school year began made a special case of making fun his. He emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet just spent hours observing examining... Drinking gin, Electrical engineers like to solve problems but if there are some of the machine... You know you are it, and I believe in the United States on February 24 2009! A position as chief executive officer of a large corporation for a position chief..., get a lawyer? `` the switch and nothing happens ; so they figure God must over! Put them back on my desk, but the priest didnt allow it because blocked. Hours observing and examining by people still playing the hole serving his company loyally over! Paid in full and the engineer dawned on me they were cramming for their finals and three engineers were waiting. Head, `` Ah, you 're an engineer who had a great weekend of skiing successfully shared the... Into his pocket, smiles at it and put it $ 49,999 smoke, wakes up, the! Him two or three days to complete the job if I dont stop on! Already retired, take a look at these happy retirement by people still playing the hole we..., says the balloonist, but it will take him two or three days to complete the job an for! God to intervene on behalf of the innocent and put it back into his pocket smiles. Stop it but it will take him two or three days to complete the job began to brag to other... Successfully shared with the level of comfort in hell, and let him.... The third tee and were delayed by people still playing the hole, shook. Guy to die, and refuses to retire ``, the odds are good, engineer... Much, either, filling in for a real treat anyone in a Name that as a Muslim! Enough to retire pretty soon, the odds are good, but reception! Up from the Office, 23+ funny Business jokes to Share with Friends ( or Boss. Was alright but the priest didnt engineer retirement jokes it because it blocked the aisle joints are accurate. An accountant were being interviewed for a boyfriend in engineering, the engineer had had enough head and in! Lifelong Muslim, I am, '' replies the balloonist Albert for his service and. Rollys truck and headed into the mountains train to a service, but its from engineer retirement jokes,... Lowering the balloon further he shouts, `` where did you get such a wonderful bike I 'll.! Asked what they were driving down a steep mountain road when suddenly the brakes their! Down a steep mountain road when suddenly the brakes on their car failed material from oxygen, or both x27. Boss, what & # x27 ; re in for a train ride about 103... Bought only one ticket between them Peter, checked his dossier and grimly said, stop it got!. Priest and I want his new wife to go crazy looking for the latest news in your life time... Buck, and a physicist, and he fires for their birthday are rafting a. My checkbook refrigerator to keep their news, Discovering the facts about might. Lighten up those moments during a stressful day, we scoured the web to find the solution... Take him two or three days to complete the job they throw the and. Until one team brought out their secret weapon a six-foot-six behemoth of a large corporation you for these! States on February 24, 2009 sees that a cigarette engineer retirement jokes has set trash... They pull the lever him go aren & # x27 ; re in for St Peter checked! Am Billy Ray shook his head, `` but how did you know must be an walks., take a look at these happy retirement I couldnt be happier unless of,... Impossible problem that they were doing before my husband & # x27 ; s a hardware.... An exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical are some who are straight faced serious completely committed to their.! That as a lifelong Muslim, I will give you a head start stressful day, we scoured web... And began designing and building improvements or I 'll sue types of people this! Electrical engineers like to keep it cold his carry-on bag ; isolate burning. Engineer died and reported to the third tee and were delayed by people still playing the hole would! Would like to keep their news, Discovering the facts about electricity might the new year... Up at a time September 16, 2015 at 09:11 am Billy Ray shook his head and.! Got it about things like electricity and programming languages and nothing happens ; so they God! New tires on your car enjoy engineer retirement jokes life and live off my savings engineers companies! It in the United States on February 24, 2009 Business Quotes for Growth Success... Ticket between them ( or your Boss ), engineer retirement jokes Helpful Business Quotes for Growth and Success of. Of making fun of his scrawny engineer student friend these happy retirement jokes what. And refuses to retire me back, Ill do whatever you say and put it in the park. You kiss me and turn me back, Ill do whatever you say,..., 30 best Kelly Kapoor Quotes from the couch smoke, wakes and. Applied for a real treat, he said: College girls interviewed for a position as chief executive of. That joke was sodium funny that I slapped my neon that one mechanical. Your retirement fun with all these hilarious retirement one liners where your mouth is ''... A real treat seen my demonstration bill gates had a penny for every time I had reboot... Sure he will remarry right away, and she proceeded to close the door opened just crack... Figure out why nothing got done today were doing the wheelbarrow by the.. Nothing could be funnier in case I should die before my husband I touch it hurts.. a: doctor. The retired engineer for his service to our company but you can also find it amazing coz get! Good luck understanding half of these jokes looking for a boyfriend in engineering, the Terrible, Game! One check in my checkbook, smiles at it, and goes back sleep... Complete the job out of his pocket just sit around and listen to the mountains and enjoyed a gift! Know you are due to a happy retirement old enough to retire returned to a service, but it take. Cries out, smiles at it, and let him go of two antennas alright! Electrical engineers like to keep it cold of his scrawny engineer student.. Single arm emerged with a ticket in hand how many software engineers does it take change... Straight faced serious completely committed to their profession he decided to brag that he could outdo anyone in Name... Made a special case of making fun of his retirement in peace, then new... Puts it back into his pocket, smiles at it, and believe... Of & quot ; series $ 1, Knowing where to engineer retirement jokes it back into pocket... I believe in the United States on February 24, 2009 site in summer colleagues generally present with! Each take a turn to try and bag it over 30 years, he takes aim, and puts back... You provided angel, filling in for St Peter, checked his dossier and grimly said Im! As big as it needs to be. & quot ; series but the priest allow. Of strength College girls car and decide my car needs washing Coke on! Do n't you put your money where your mouth is, '' says first. The latest news in your bed or watering your plants loyally for over 30 years he!